The Episode begins with Blanche coming home early from her aerobics class; she’s injured herself.
Apparently, there was a hot, new male instructor and when he wanted to help Blanche stretch, she flipped over and onto her back too quickly (her words):
Next, Dorothy’s son – Michael – pops in for a visit:
SIDE NOTE: Michael’s visit is the A-Plot; Blanche’s woefully-unattended vagina is the B-Plot, if memory serves.
Michael’s a jazz-saxophonist who recently quit his regular gig because the club he played in wanted everybody to wear a suit & tie, but ties just choke your spirit:
SIDE NOTE 2: Michael looks like a cross between Gabe Kaplan (Mr. Kotter) and porn-legend John Holmes:
SIDE NOTE 3: The guy playing Michael is Scott Jacoby; Scott played the son of a gay guy who wanted to have a public relationship with another gay guy (played by Martin Sheen), but couldn’t because it was the 70’s:(
The movie was a critically-acclaimed, award-winning hit; the Brokeback Mountain of its day:
Next through the door for a visit (and prompting a St. Olaf story) is Rose’s daughter, Bridget:
SIDE NOTE 4: Bridget is played by Marilyn Jones and without Googling it, I recall that she was in a couple of failed soap operas in the early-80’s, as well as being in Remington Steele…
…and Matlock: 
Contrary to what you might think (and re-affirming my long-held belief that Rose is not slow, just naive and utterly sweet), her daughter Bridget is a genius headed to Oxford. No joke.
The next day, Rose & her daughter spend the day together, doing all kinds of “Country Living” things and Rose tells a couple of St. Olaf stories that I don’t recall, cuz I’m drinking heavily.
Then Blanche finds out from her doctor that she can’t be doing anything physical for the next week and she laments all the fucking she won’t be doing ’til next week’s episode.
Bridget spends that night taking shots at what a loser Michael is, while Dorothy continues her 30+year losing streak to her mother, Sophia, at cards:
Bored and tired from tossing insults (Michael & Bridget, respectively), the 2 of them decide to head out for a night on the town.
Later, Rose discovers what they eventually got up to:
The next few minutes were the pretty standard fair of everyone being shocked that two, healthy, young people of consensual age forced to spend hours together could possibly get boners for one another.
The mood was lightened when Sophia came in & Michael said, “It’s not what it looks like, Grandma”, and Sophia responded that she might not remember what it feels like, but she sure as hell remembers what it looks like.
Ha!
A few minutes after that were spent in the living room with Rose & Dorothy insulting each other’s kids, which seemed normal but out-of-character (for Rose).
Then Blanche re-tells a story about how she got kicked out of a girl’s school in her youth because of this one guy she kept bringing to her room to ride like a Ferris Wheel:
A Few Days Later:
Sophia decides to mourn the loss of the innocence of her grandson, Michael:
And Blanche talks about sex again:
Eventually, Blanche confesses to Dorothy that it’s been 4 days since she had a penis thrust repeatedly into her vagina and then she (seriously) macks on Dorothy:
Because the Episode is almost over, Dorothy reconciles with her son, Michael (as does Rose with her daughter, Bridget) and then Blanche defies her doctor’s orders by dressing up and heading out to end the Great Vagina Drought of ’86:
St. Olaf Stories: 3
# of Men Blanche referenced sex/had sex with: 4
“Picture It” Stories from Sophia: 0
Dorothy complained about teaching and/or her ex: 1
Unanswered Question: What was the name of the band Michael played in?
The Golden Girls Reviewed 